Funny Jokes

Scene: Husband and Wife in court getting a divorce.
The problem: who should get custody of the child????
Wife jumped up and said: “Your Honour! I brought the child into this world with pain and labour so it should be in my
custody.”
The judge turns to Husband and says “What do you have to say in your defence?”
The husband sat for a while contemplating then slowly rose.
“Your Honour. If I put a dollar in a vending machine and a Pepsi comes out, whose Pepsi is it? the machine’s or mine?”
Yeh sunke…Wife replied : “Judge sahab…bartan mera…doodh bhi mera…aur usme dahi jamane ke liye 2 boond daalne se dahi bana
to fir wo dahi kiska..? mera ya do boond daalne wale ka”
Husband replied : “Typewriter mein kagaz Maine dala, keys daba-daba kar mehnat Maine ki, fir chithi kiski? typewriter ki
ya meri?”
Frustrated Judge (getting mad): “Abay saale agar Tu chithi haath se hi likh leta to yahan par custody ki
naubat hi na aati.”